Shameful!

It has been an insane two weeks of sickness, elections, traveling to the US, holidays, and family. I am exhausted and still sick, but here...again...finally. I get quite wrapped up in the business of "nature" and perhaps that makes no sense. I will explain. If there is something I feel I should be worrying about or helping do or control I will busy myself with its concerns even while I have nothing really to do. This, I have found, includes the things that are far from my control. I busy my mind or my energy on them even when there is nothing to be done. It is like the weather. There is nothing I can do to control the rainy season downpours in Grenada or the beautiful 60 degree weather we are currently enjoying in Grenada, but I would busy my mind with it and distract from what is waiting patiently for me to just sit and be.

Last night, my daughter put me square in my place. I have so preoccupied with our big decision for clinicals and the next destination for our med school adventure that I have been getting nowhere fast staring at internet sites and housing and such to a fault. Graciebug was waiting patiently in bed last night while I pitter pattered here and there and everywhere, getting tea for her cousin, doing a little nothing of this and a little nothing of that....all because of my nervous energy. I had promised a good long foot rub and cuddle with my #1. When I finally arrived in the room once more and did not immediately curl up but found something else to mess with, she made her judgement. Sitting straight up with her hands properly and evenly placed on her hips she declared, "Mommy! It is ALL about me! It is me in schedule. Me time, Mommy! Me!" Okay. I was jolted as she continued to present her case citing my promises I had made to her about a good cuddle and that she needed me and on and on....I put down whatever it was I thought so important (I can't even recall) and got my little self right where I should have been in the first place and quieted my mind and cuddling my little bug.